17 Comments
User's avatar
Chris Hale's avatar

You have educated me! I never realised Mary was called Immaculate too, I thought it was the conception.

I love the explanation about “Extra Virgin”.

Dale Rowett AR OK VA PA NY's avatar

Well, thanks, I guess. Now I know something I really didn't need to know.

Old Pius Number Nine put out some next-level, made-up bullshit for his faithful to swallow whole. I ain't buyin' it. I've seen the birth videos and there's no way Mary didn't get a little bit of original sin on her when she slid down the birth canal. Gross!

In fact, it's no wonder we're all a little bit fucked up ... when birth is our first experience of this world.

Brietta Kiele's avatar

If Mary was sinless and perfect, why do we need Jesus? Couldn't Mary have died for our sins? Or was a penis also a requirement for a savior? Which is ironic, since a penis wasn't required for the conception.

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

Patriarchal religion = Penis required.

Celine's avatar

As a long, long-lapsed cradle Catholic, I'm ever so pleased when someone gets it right about what the Immaculate Conception is. You explained it exactly the way the nuns did! Well, maybe a bit swearier.

Chuck Gartland's avatar

This relates to that trick question we were asked in religion class in catholic school. I remember answering it incorrectly and being chastised for always thinking about sex (not wrong there I was 15) and then being taught this was all about Mary. This author gets the doctrine right albeit irreverently. It was fun to read as a recovering catholic who looks back on his catholic school education fondly when not wincing.

Jedi Senshi's avatar

God did not ask Mary’s consent for her to conceive &/or to carry Jesus. Divine or not, God RAPED Mary.

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

Not surprising since consent was an unknown concept in those days (if they ever actually happened).

Alye's avatar

In late elementary school I began to think about Mary’s plight and started to misbehave as hard as I could so god wouldn’t molest me. I didn’t understand the mechanics of sex but I sure as hell recognized that Mary was getting fucked over

Glenn Fontaine's avatar

Hoping to go to Hell so I can get promoted to Demon and eventually poke Trump in the ass with a pitchfork.

Ethereal Fairy's avatar

A most worthy cause! Get Scalia and Rushbo too, while you are at it. I suspect they are Lava hot tub buddies.

DW Davis's avatar

The Catholic Church had a penchant for making up stories to justify the dogma it wanted to impose on people.

Hannah's avatar

Why do their pictures have so many naked babies flying around.

Anyone know?

Seems perverse. Are they dead flying naked babies?

Patris's avatar

I’ll be in the cauldron next to you, pretty sure.

Lori's avatar

The Bible is older than the Catholic Church. When we push God out of our lives & out of society we get the world we see. We are watching the book of Revelation being played out before our eyes.

🌈 Lance Trottier 🌈's avatar

And, by the way,

It all leads to Jesus not really being the Son of God, but rather as a Prophet.. and there is speculation that that other Mary that was supposedly a whore was the real Prophet.

🌈 Lance Trottier 🌈's avatar

Yeah, supposedly Miss Mary was Extra Virgin... or Virgin Deluxe... or Virgin 2.0... according to the Bible and Hard-on... I mean Hardcore... Christians.

C'mon, Joey knew full that Mary was fucking around, and that the little thing growing inside of her was not his, but he said, "Fuck it all to Hell, I'm gonna marry this cheatin' Bitch, make an honest wom of her, and raise the Little Brat as my own even though that Invisible Dude in the Sky and his cohort, the Holey Spurt, had their ways with her and got her knocked up. While we're at it, we're gonna name it after my BFF, Hey-Suz!