On This Day in History: May 5

Cinco de Mayo

AUDIO VERSION HERE

“Please tell people that Cinco de Mayo is NOT Mexican Independence Day!”–People on my Facebook page.

“Okay.”–Me

It’s not.

There. Job done.

--On This Day in History Shit Went Down: May 5, 1862--

Mexico did indeed fight for self-rule; the country’s Independence Day is September 16, marking the outbreak of the rebellion against their Spanish overlords in 1810, a war that would last for 11 years and result in almost half a million lives lost.

Cinco de Mayo is about a different war in Mexico, one that happened half a century later. It commemorates a single battle in Puebla, which is now a city of over 3 million, but back then it was just a small town in east-central Mexico.

At the time, Mexico had experienced years of internal strife, which is never good for the economy. It was in deep debt to Britain, France, and Spain. Back then, when you couldn’t pay your debts, you didn’t get harassing phone calls from some soulless douche at a collection agency; you got warships.

The pissed-off Europeans landed at the port of Veracruz in the Gulf of Mexico. The Mexican government was able to come to an understanding with the British and Spaniards, who withdrew their fleets. But the French decided to be dicks. I mean, they were being ruled by a guy named Napoleon III at the time, if that tells you anything. Guys with that name do tend toward dick behavior.

I try not to be a dick so please

France wanted to carve a chunk out of Mexico and claim it for its own. Six thousand French troops marched inland to attack Puebla. On May 5, 1862, a meager 2,000 poorly armed defenders launched a counterassault against the French and kicked some Euro ass. By the time the French withdrew, they had lost almost 500 soldiers, but the Mexicans lost fewer than 100.

Strategically, it wasn’t a major victory in the war, but symbolically it energized the resistance to the invaders. Eventually, the U.S. got involved on the side of Mexico and the French withdrew in 1867.

In modern Mexico, they don’t care much about Cinco de Mayo except in the state of Puebla. No one ever needs an excuse to eat tacos. Now I want tacos.

Get the book On This Day in History Sh!t Went Down.