On This Day in History: January 13

Polar adventurer Jade Hameister trolls the trolls

In 2016, when Jade Hameister was only fourteen years old, she cross-country skied almost a hundred miles to the North Pole; the youngest person ever to do so. The temperature was hideous-below-zero, the ice shifting and unstable. There were goddamn polar bears. But she did it. And got trolled online by whiny piss-baby penis possessors. She trolled them right back.

--On This Day in History Shit Went Down: January 13, 2018--

In 2016 Jade, an Australian, gave a TEDx talk in Melbourne, and it was posted to YouTube. You know in Star Wars when Obi-Wan Kenobi said of the Mos Eisley spaceport that “you will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy”? The old Jedi never imagined a YouTube comment section. The misogyny was palpable. Many told Jade to “Make me a sandwich,” a common catchphrase used by sexist douchenuggets to demean women.

So, Jade made them a sandwich. Continues below …

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But first she skied across Greenland. Going across the polar icecaps, in June of 2017 she traveled almost 350 miles in twenty-seven days, becoming the youngest woman to accomplish such a feat. With two down, Jade was determined to complete the “polar hat-trick.” All that remained was skiing to the South Pole.

She began her trek late in 2017, starting at the Ross Ice Shelf on the coast of Antarctica. The trip took thirty-seven days, and she arrived at the South Pole on January 10, 2018. Three days later, on January 13, Jade posed for a photo and posted it to her social media. The photo shows Jade in bright pink winter attire, standing next to the South Pole marker, flags representing various countries waving in the icy breeze behind her. In her right hand she holds a plate with a sandwich resting atop. She commented that it was “for all those men” who left the sandwich comments, writing, “I made you a sandwich (ham & cheese), now ski thirty-seven days and 600km to the South Pole and you can eat it.” Hashtag fucking boom hashtag motherfucking mic drop.

Jade did leave out two additionally impressive metrics in her righteous burn. She began her journey at sea level. The elevation of the South Pole is 9,300 feet. Well, since she’s Australian let’s clarify that as 2,800 meters. Anyway, way the fuck up there. She skied uphill the whole goddamn way. The other metric is that she did this while pulling a 220-pound sled.

The idea of the sandwich was a joke discussed during the trip to the pole, but never that serious. It was only at the last minute she decided to actually do it. Their camp was only half a mile from the pole, so she skied back with the sandwich for the pic, referring to the whole thing as “just kind of funny.”

Goddamn hysterical if you ask me.

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