I Spent More Time in Zero G than Katy Perry Did

And I'm not an astronaut either

There I am, floating in freefall. I spent a total of six minutes totally weightless. Katy Perry was weightless for only four minutes.

Neither of us are astronauts.

Technically, she went to the edge of space, about 100 kilometres above the surface of Earth called the Kármán line, which is considered the border of space. They spent four minutes in freefall, then returned. The entire flight lasted eleven minutes, and upon touching back down to Earth Katy kissed the ground, which I expect the astronauts who just returned to Earth after more than nine months on the International Space Station found rather hilarious.

She wasn’t an astronaut, she was a passenger. So was I for my zero g flight. The big difference was that I didn’t need some billionaire pal to do it. I didn’t need to pay a dime, just write an article about the experience.

Back in 2017 I was a fitness columnist writing for the Los Angeles Times, Chicago Tribune, and a website called AskMen. The first two were pretty uptight about the whole journalistic integrity thing of getting expensive things for free in exchange for writing an article, but the latter wasn’t. When I found out Zero Gravity Corporation was going to be doing flights out of Las Vegas while I was there for my daughter’s karate tournament (she won gold in the USA Open that year), I pitched the company to let me tag along in exchange for writing an article.

Here is the piece, first published in the spring of 2017 in my AskMen column:

The phrase “The most fun you can have with your clothes on” is overused and often misapplied. But in the case of floating in zero gravity, it might be true.

Emphasis on the word “fun.”

Some people thought I was crazy. Some said no way they would ever do this. But there is little to no fear in taking a zero-g flight. There is no strain of effort. I wouldn’t call it an adrenaline rush.

It’s just an unreal amount of fun. All caps, three exclamation marks, I think they filled the plane with laughing gas, FUN!!!

Don’t get me wrong, I love gravity. Gravity is awesome. I have leapt from perfectly good airplanes. I ski downhill at breakneck speeds. I ride my bike through twists and turns with sphincter clenched tight and hands ready to slam the brakes to avoid collision. Gravity makes all that possible. Plus, there is the whole “not getting hurled into the asphyxiating vacuum of space” stuff I appreciate about it as well. Thanks, Sir Isaac.

But because of gravity, I have crashed. I have broken things. When I do those “adrenaline rush” sports it’s a combination of strenuous effort and near pants-fudging fear. There is danger. Plus, fun. Perhaps “excitement” is a better word.

Floating in zero g isn’t like those gravity-based activities at all. Taking such a flight is a world unto itself. Anyone can do it without breaking a sweat or fear of getting hurt. Little children do it. Really old people do it. Stephen Hawking has done it!

You need not be an adrenaline junkie. You need not muster courage. You need only desire the thrill of a lifetime. And by “thrill” I mean a ridiculous amount of fun.

And short of getting into a rocket ship and leaving Earth’s atmosphere, there is only one way to experience true zero g, and that’s with a company called Zero Gravity Corporation, “a privately held space entertainment and tourism company.”

I expect you have questions. Here are answers.

How does it work?
You get in a big plane, fly up high, then go into a nose dive that matches the 9.8 meters per second squared force of Earth’s gravitational pull, creating weightlessness that lasts about 30 seconds per dive.

We take off in a specially modified 727 with seats only at the back. When we reach the area safe for us to do our parabolic maneuvers, we go into the empty, padded area in front of the seats. During the climb, we lie flat to pull 1.8 g as we climb to 32,000 feet. The near doubling of g force is not that noticeable as you lie there, unless you try to raise your arms, legs, or head. That’s when you feel it.

ZERO-G has a video on their site showing how these parabolic maneuvers work.

Is it safe?
“In my old job piloting civilians on jetliners,” said Derek Fallon, the captain for our flight with ZERO-G, which has been offering such flights to the public since 2004, “I didn’t want to spill anyone’s drink. You climb gently, turn gently, and descend gently.” But the reality of these planes is that they can handle a lot. They’re built to withstand turbulence and storms.

For Captain Fallon, being aggressive with such a plane was a bit intimidating at first. “During the ascent, we’re looking at the sky, and during the descent we’re looking at the ground coming up towards us.”

The pilots can hear the screams of joy coming from the back of the plane, the people in the cockpit are usually hooting and hollering just as much.

“Doesn’t matter how many times I do it,” Fallon said, “Sometimes I can’t control my laughter.”

The transitions between gravity and zero g and back are gradual. The biggest danger is someone flailing and poking you in the eye. That’s why during the pre-flight orientation the instructors repeatedly tell you not to “swim.” You will bump into other people, but because you have no weight, even when you bounce into someone else you just gently ricochet away. It doesn’t hurt.

Does it really feel like being in space?
I’ve never been to space, but I can tell you this plane is what they use to test products that they must know are going to work on the International Space Station.

“The 3-D printer that’s up at the space station right now was tested on our plane,” said Terese Brewster, president of ZERO-G. And this is how astronauts are trained for experiencing zero g.

Based on how expensive it is to blast things and people into orbit, and that they trust this plane to mimic the conditions, I expect the sensation is the same. What sensation is that? What is the sound of one hand clapping? I’ve done a lot of exciting, adventurous things, and can’t compare this to any of them. It’s not like jumping off a high diving board or skydiving or being on a roller coaster, because there is no sensation of falling.

Suddenly, that lifetime of experience of gravity weighing you down, inexorably pulling you towards the earth, is just … gone. And it’s not frightening. It’s wondrous.

Can I bang in zero g?
This is the #1 request ZERO-G gets: people want to rent out the plane and try freefall fornication. But the answer is a firm “No” for three reasons:

Reason #1: Ew.

Reason #2: You do realize that each period of zero g only lasts 30 seconds, right?

Reason #3: Ew.

Will I barf?
Probably not.

Terese Brewster said only about 5% feel sick. Doing what you’re told helps prevent this. During the high g climb, lie flat, look straight ahead, and don’t whip your head around. Also, don’t go out partying the night before.

Speaking of which, I did the flight in Las Vegas. One of the 27 participants didn’t listen to the “don’t party the night before” advice. After 12 of the 15 parabolas, he blew his groceries. Fortunately, he got it all in the barf bag. There were no little globules of hurl floating around the plane, fortunately.

Such planes get nicknamed “Vomit Comet,” but it usually takes way more than 15 parabolas before people start getting sick. Also, ZERO-G acclimatizes you by doing the first parabola at “Martian gravity,” followed by two more at “Lunar gravity.”

Lunar was a hoot for this fitness guy. Doing a push-up and flying all the way up to the ceiling of the plane was a thrill.

At one point during a zero g maneuver I curled into a little ball and fellow flyer Melissa spun me. I have never spun so fast, but because there was no gravity, it wasn’t disorienting. It was hilarious.

Why do people do this?
“It is something that is unlike anything else you can currently do,” said Terese Brewster. “There are only two ways to experience weightlessness: go to space, or fly on our plane. It’s not like skydiving or scuba diving or bungee jumping. Some people say it’s very Zen. Different people feel it in different ways. Some get very emotional. There are people who have no idea what the science behind it is, but they just think it’s fun.”

Like I said: Fun. As soon as gravity disappears, people revert to childhood. Laughter and screams of joy are constant. Everyone is grinning from ear to ear.

Who does this?
Model Kate Upton, for starters. She went up in the same plane in a bikini for the Sports Illustrated 50^th anniversary issue.

Richard Branson has done it. And on my flight, we had a pair of retired school teachers, as well as travelers from the UK and France, and a family of five from Toronto.

Why did I do it? Because it’s something I’ve wanted to do ever since I learned it was a thing you could do. When I was in elementary school, a teacher asked us to design our dream home, and mine had a zero-gravity room in it. I’ve been imagining this for ages.

And the experience did not disappoint.

Why is your name tag upside down?
It’s a NASA thing. It’s a tradition for identifying newbies. After the flight, they turn it right-side up.

How much does it cost?
Can’t dance around this one; it’s not cheap.

The cost is $4,950, but like I said, there were retired school teachers on the flight. It’s not just an experience for the wealthy. (UPDATE: The price has risen to $8,900. Ouch.)

I’m more about paying for experiences than paying for stuff. Experience lasts forever. Or, until dementia. There are plenty of silly things people waste money on. This is an experience I expect few people regret saving up for and investing in. I asked many of my fellow flyers, and they all said it was worth it.

How can I do it?
Visit the ZERO-G site and check out the dates and cities; it’s a traveling road show. In the air. That simulates being in space. Currently, they’re only licensed to conduct these flights in the U.S., with regularly scheduled flights in Las Vegas, Los Angeles, Miami, Orlando, D.C., New York, Seattle and San Francisco.

You said it was fun, right?
So much fun. Towards the end, they break out the candy and squirt some water so you can try and catch it in your mouth. If you need more convincing as to how much fun, here is a video I posted on Facebook.

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